baka and aho
by afairysoared
Summary: Just chapters about Ahomine and Bakagami fighting and the generation of miracles getting caught up in their fights. I will keep updating! next people they are going to meet is Kise!
1. You don't want to play a game with me?

"TERIYAKI BURGER!"

"CHEESE BURGER!"

"OH PLEASE, BAKAGAMI. I BET YOU NEVER EVEN HAD A TERIYAKI BURGER IN YOU LIFE!'

"OH YEAH, I BET NEVER HAD A CHEESEBURGER IN YOUR LIFE!"

"Kagami-kun, Aomine-kun, please stop shouting. You are attracting glares."

"BUT TETSU, HE THINKS TERIYAKI BURGERS ARE BAD!"

"COME ON, KUROKO, YOU'VE HAD A TERIYAKI BURGER BEFORE, TELL HIM ITS BAD."

"Actually Kagami-kun, Teriyaki burger is quite good."

"AHAHAHAAA I TOLD YOU!"

"But I prefer my vanilla milk shake."

"Oi, Bakagami. Lets do this. I eat a chesseburger while you eat a Teriyaki."

"Wow. The first mildly intelligent thing you have ever said."

"SHUTTIT! SO DEAL OR NO DEAL?!"

"Hm... deal."

"... Tetsu, i wasn't talking to you."

"Ah. So you don't want to play this game with me?"

"No! Its not even a game!"

"I see. The both of you don't like me anymore."

"What? It was Ahomine, not me."

"Oh. I see. Then, Kagami-kun. Would you like to play this game with me? I'll give you a vanilla milk shake while I get a cheeseeburger."

"Um... You see... I already had a milk shake before... and... and..." Kagami trailed off as Kuroko's face darkened.

"So you don't want to play this game either."

"Um... oi, Bakagami. I have to go. Um... Satsuki is waiting for me... at... um... at practice! Yeah, she's waiting for me at practice! See ya, you too... um... Tetsu."

With that, Ahomine ran out of Maji burger with customers staring at him.

"Ah. Aomine-kun is going to practice for once. I shall forgive him."

"Eh? What about me? I go to practice all the time too!"

"You didn't want to play a game with me."

"But... um..."

"You are my light but you didn't want to play a game with me."

"Um... Kuroko... this was never a game, you see..."

"Oh? Then you two lied to me. Thats even worse than not playing with me."

"Wha? But Kuroko, we never told you... that... this... was... a... game..." Kagami trailed off as Kuroko looked at him as the chopsticks he was holding snapped in half.

"You will be punished..."

"Eh? Punished? But why, I didn't do anyth-"

"By Akashi."

"..."

"Yes, Kagami, the guy who almost killed you with a pair of scissors."

"NOOOOOO! KUROKO PLEASEE! HE IS GOING TO KILL MEEEE! WHAT ABOUT AHOMINE?! HE LIED TO YOU TOO!"

"He is forgiven because he is going to practice."

"NOOOOO PLEASE!"

Kagami was never seen again after that.


	2. Takao, you imbecile

"IT COUNTED!'

"NO IT DIDN'T!"

"PLEASE, AHOMINE, LIKE YOU CAN SEE ANYTHING WITH THOSE SQUINTY EYES!"

"AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE WEIRD ASS EYEBROWS!"

"AT LEAST I'M NOT A GANGURO!"

-Somewhere in the park-

"Shin-channnnn I'm tired!'

"Keep pedaling Takao, you imbecile."

"But, Shin-chan why do I have to go so fast?"

"Quit complaining! It's because I have bad luck today!"

"But... we're going up a hill!'

"I don't see why thats a problem, now shut your trap and keep cycling!"

They cycled quietly. Takao too tired to whine and Midorima drinking tea in the cart.

"Hey... Shin-chan? Do you hear something?"

"Hmmmm"

They listened closely...

"YOU LOOK LIKE AN INDIAN!"

"AT LEAST INDIANS DON'T HAVE SPLIT EYEBROWS!"

Midorima's face darkened, as if he has seen a ghost.

"Oh dear god, Takao, turn around."

"But why?"

"Just turn!"

"Eh? Isn't that the ace from Tuou and Seirin? Lets go say hi!"

"NO. TAKAO YOU RETARD. GET US OUT OF HERE."

"Wowwww. Shin-chan just said some rude words."

"DESPERATE TIMES CALL FOR DESPERATE MEASURES. NOW TURN AROUND."

"Ah. Look, they saw us. Don't be rude, lets say hiiii."

"TAKAO! I HATE YOU. LET THE POWER OF THE STARS FALL UPON YOU."

"..."

"..."

"Nothings happening, Shin-chan."

-Back at the courts-

"LOOK! ITS SPECTACLE FREAK AND HAWK MAN! LETS ASK THEM."

"SURE BAKAGAMI."

"WHY ARE WE STILL SHOUTING?!"

"I DONT KNOW AND I DONT CARE!"

They approached Midorima strangling a laughing Takao.

"HOW DO YOU LIKE THIS, YOU-"

"Oi. we need your help."

Midorima looked at Aomine and felt his face drain of color.

"GET AWAY FROM ME! YOU ARE ALL BAD LUCK!"

"Geez. Don't need to be pushy. We just want you to see if this point counted or not."

Takao pulled out of Midorima's grasp.

"I'll help you since Shin-chan here is such a tsundere!"

"TAKAO. YOU HAVE 5 SECONDS TO GET BACK HERE AND PEDAL OR ELSE... 5"

Kagami and Aomine started fighting whether or not Kise's hair was really natural.

"4"

"ITS OBVIOUS HE DYED IT. HES A MODEL FOR GODS SAKE!"

"3"

"I KNEW HIM SINCE MIDDLE SCHOOL, HIS HAIR IS NATURAL!"

"2"

"Guys. I'm gonna run now before Midorima *snicker* uses the power of the stars on me again."

"1"

MIdorima lunged at all 3 of them.

"GYAHHHH! BAKAGAMI, DON'T TOUCH THERE!"

"ITS NOT LIKE I WANT TO! EWWWWW!"

"TAKAO COME HERE, YOU LITTLE WORM!"

"HELP MEEEE!"

"GET OFF OF ME YOU GUYS!"

"WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE IM TRYING TO DO, BAKAGAMI?! ITS NOT LIKE I WANT TO LAY ON YOU!"

"TAKAO!"

"SHIN-CHAN IS GOING TO THROW HIS CERAMIC OCTOPUS AT ME! HELP!"

"OI! AHOMINE YOU FU-"

"AHAHAHAAAAA WHO THREW THE OCTOPUS AT HIS HEAD?! DAMN, THAT WAS SOME NASTY SHI- GAHHHHHHH MIDORIMA GET OFF ME!"

"TAKAO. I AM HOLDING THIS GANGURO AS A HOSTAGE. IF YOU DO NOT COME TO ME, I WILL KILL HIM."

"OI. WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU TSUNDERE?!"

"FINEEEEEE. I'LL COME WITH YOU! BUT LEAVE THE GANGURO ALONE!"

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU GUYS CALL ME?! AOMINE KICK!"

"UHHHH... GUYS? WHATS HAPPENI-"

"AH SHIT. SORRY BAKAGAMI! I WAS AIMING FOR MIDO- OI. ARE YOU OKAY?"

"TAKAOOOOOOO GET OVER HERE!"

"GUYS! I KILLED BAKAGAMI! WHAT DO I DO?! I DON'T WANNA GO TO THE POLICE!"

"IM GONNA DIEEEEE!"

The teo of them were all writhing on the ground, tangled with each other while poor Kagami lay on the floor as Aomine cried about not wanting to go to prison. Unknown to them, Kise was hiding behind a tree and taking a video of them.

"Hehehehe. Wait till I show Kurokochi!"


	3. My fans are gonna think I'm weird!

"Oi Kise. Gimme the phone."

"N-no."

"Just give him the phone dammit."

"Bu-but..."

"If you don't give it, I will personally kill you and make sure no one ever finds your body."

"Oi Ahomine. Thats going way too far."

"Shuttit. I know what you're doing. Trying to look like the good guy so that everyone will love you. But no fucking way am I falling for that!"

"WHAT THE HELL, AHO! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW ME THAT WELL! WE JUST PLAY BASKETBALL TOGETHER!"

"OI! DON'T SHOUT AT ME! YOU SOUND JUST LIKE SATSUKI. JUST NAGGING AND NAGGING AND NAGGING NON STOP! SHUT YER FEMININE FACE!"

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY?!"

"Um... guys?"

"SHUTTIT KISE!"

Kise slowly backed away and ran down the street to Kuroko's house.

"OH YEAH! WE HAVEN'T FOUND OUT YET."

"FOUND OUT ABOUT WHAT, IDIOT?"

"KISE'S HAIR THINGY DUMBASS."

"Oh yeah."

"What? So now you can talk normally without screaming your fucking face off, bakagami?"

"WHAT THE HELL?! YOU CAN GO DIE!"

"OI KISE! ON A COMPLETELY UNRELATED TOPIC, IS YOUR HAIR COLOR NATUR- WHAT THE HELL? WHERE DID HE GO?!"

"AH! HE ESCAPED! WHAT IF KUROKO SEES US FIGHTING WITH THE GLASSES FREAK ON THE VIDEO?! HE WON'T ACCEPT ME AS HIS LIGHT!"

"SHIT! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! NAGGING ME LIKE AN OLD WOMAN!"

"WHA- MY FAULT?! MY FAULT?! IT WAS YOUR FAULT!"

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY?! YOU WANNA HAVE A GO? RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW?! OR ARE YOU TOO SCARED, BAKAGAMI?!"

"OH ITS ON, AHOMINE! JUST DON'T GO CRYING TO MOMOI WHEN I BEAT YOU UP!"

"OH PLEASE, YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T BEAT ME, ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU GOT KNOCKED OUT BY JUST ONE OF MY AOMINE KICKS!"

"AT LEAST I DIDN'T CRY LIKE A LITTLE BABY ABOUT GOING TO JAIL FOR MURDER!"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"

"OH LOOK. DUMB AND DEAF. WHAT A SURPRISE."

"OHHHH... YOU ARE SO GOING TO GET IT NOW..."

"STOP!"

"What the hell, Kise."

"I cannot stand to see my two dear friends, Aominechi and Kagamichi make a fool out of themselves in public! Especially with my fans around! What do you think they will think when they see me around you two imbeci-"

"I THOUGHT YOU LEFT! NO ONE WANTS YOU HERE!"

"AOMINECHI! YOU RUINED MY PERFECT JAW! I JUST WANTED TO SEE HOW YOU TWO WERE DOING!"

"HEY HEY HEY! I KNOW THAT AOMINE IS AN IMBECILE, BUT WHAT ABOUT ME?! I AM PERFECTLY NORMAL AND WELL BEHAVED!"

"Omg. isn't that Kise Ryouta? Why is he rolling on the floor with other guys? In public. Ew. That is just. Like. So gross. Ugh I can't believe that I ever thought he was like, totally hot."

"NOOOOO! AOMINECHI, KAGAMICHI! LOOK WHAT YOU DID! NOW MY FANS THINK I'M AN IMBECILE TOO!"

"I. SAID. NOT. TO. CALL. ME. THAT..."

"OHOHOHOHOO! LOOK AT THAT! LITTLE BAKAGAMI IS GETTING ANG-"

"AHHHH! KAGAMICHIII! YOU KNOCKED HIM OUT!"

"HE ASKED FOR IT!"

"NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT! WHO IS GOING TO CARRY HIM TO HIS HOUSE?! HE'S TOO HEAVY!"

"..."

"..."

"Kise. Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

"Huh? I was just waiting for your answer. I wasn't thinking about anything!"

*sigh*

-Takao-

"Hello! You have just reached the marvelous Takao! Eh? Kagami? Hi hi! Did your head injury heal yet? Oh that's good. So what can I do for you? You want what? My rickshaw? Why? AHAHAHAHAHA! So you knocked him out?! AHAHAHAHHA! Serves him right indeed. Ok! Comi-"

"Takao? Who are you talking to?"

"Ah Shin-chan! Its Kagami! Oh, Kagami, I'm with Shin-chan in the locker room. Yup, gonna be there in a second."

"No. I forbid you."

"K bye. What was that Shin-chan?"

"I forbId you to go anywhere near them. Also, I need the rickshaw."

"BUt shin-channnnn. The dark one from Tuou is out cold. We need to help them."

"Oh? He fainted? That's good. Now killing him will be much easier."

"Huh? What was that?"

"Nothing. I changed my mind. Takao. Bring the rickshaw but bring him here."

"Why? Shouldn't I bring him to his house?"

"No need. It is possible that he has a light concussion. I will check on him."

"Awwww! Shin-chan really does care about your ex-teammates."

"Of course. Now get going."

"Yessir!"

The door slammed shut as Takao left to get the unconscious Aomine.

Midorima's glasses gleamed evilly.

"Now... for my revenge..."

AHAHAHAHAA SORRY IF IT WAS TOO RUSHED! I JUST HAVENT UPDATED IN A REALLY LONG TIME AND I WAS DESPERATE TO UPLOAD A NEW CHAPTER! I HOPE IT WAS OK! I JUST COULDNT HELP BUT ADD IN MIDORIMA AND TAKAO! HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT! MY FINAL EXAMS ARE OVER, SO I SHOULD BE UPDATING MORE! THANKS FOR READING! PLEASE REVIEW!

-afairysoared


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